a. Losada’s research determined that you need a 3:1 positive-to-negative ratio to have a thriving relationship with one another or in a team. Below that ratio, you have problems, and above that ratio, you see thriving relationships.
b. Negativity has a stronger effect than positivity…which is why a 1:1 or even a 2:1 does not create a flourishing relationship. It takes a 3:1 relationship—which was buttressed by Frederickson’s research.
c. Marriages (and high performing teams) need a 5:1 ratio! John Gottman, also known as the love doctor, has studied couples and can predict accurately whether people will divorce in the future based on this ratio after viewing a video of the couple interacting for a short period of time.
d. Gottman has found that in marriage, healthy conflict is productive and normal. But he also sees contempt and disgust very destructive.
e. How to Assess Your Own Positivity: The author offers a “Positivity Self Test.” She also recommends taking it several times a week over a period of time to get an accurate reading—a baseline.