Beyond Happy: Post #2--No One Can Do it All

No One Can Do It All. How would you like two full-time jobs? Well, if you’re a woman in America today, there’s a pretty good chance that’s your fate, along with exhaustion. Outdated workplace policies, 19th century expectations of women, continuing gender discrimination (like pay), and a host of unfair public policies, like woefully inadequate maternity leave for mothers, all stack the deck against women. Cabrera recounts this with the precision and directness of a seasoned researcher and with the heart of a working mother, who has been there herself. And her key finding is that women want exactly what everyone wants: To live a happy and meaningful life. Her precise formula is that Well-Being = Feeling Good (happy and positive) and Doing Good (having a sense of meaning and purpose).

Flourish: Post #3 - Positive Psychology

Positive Psychology that Works
a. Why is positive psychology worth pursuing?
a. Simple answer: It gets results—success rates in reducing depression and remission rates: 55% (positive psychology); 20% for treatment as usual; and just 8% for usual treatment and drugs!
b. Fifty people did the “What went well” exercise for just one week, and 47 of the 50 became less depressed. That’s an amazing result. At that rate one could even call it a potential law (with testing on a much larger scale).
b. The Gratitude Visit: Seligman suggests writing a one pager to a person who’s meant a lot to us in our lives and then delivering the message in person. Communicating sincere thanks for help along the path of life makes both recipient and donor much more positive immediately.
c. What Went Well (Three Blessings Exercise): Write down three things each day that went well and why you think they went well. I do this nightly and keep a small notebook in a prominent place so I don’t forget to do it. Makes a huge difference.
d. Gratitude List: Keeping a list of 3-5 things you’re grateful for—including even those we often take for granted like running water, heat in the winter, sunlight—is a great way to prime your day with a positive push out the door that can color the rest of the day.
e. Signature Strengths: Go to www.authentichappiness.com and take the signature strengths instrument. Try to use your strengths daily, especially if you want to feel the sense of flow (being totally engaged in the moment) and to flourish…being the best you can be.

Flourish: Post#1 - Overview

Overview: A vaunted professor at the University of Pennsylvania, Martin Seligman is the architect of positive psychology—which studies how to make people not just less depressed, anxious, or angry but also happier and flourishing. I believe that Flourish, Seligman’s latest book, will stand as a classic text for psychologists and lay people alike who are interested in finding out how to live a better, happier, more productive and meaningful life. His research boils down to a theory of well-being constructed by seeking P-E-R-M-A: Positive Emotion, Engagement, Relationships (positive), Meaning, and Accomplishment. His theory of well-being evolves from his original work on Authentic Happiness. He spends much of his book discussing each of the PERMA critical elements of what gives us well-being, not just smiley-faced, self-absorbed happiness. A self-proclaimed depressive (read that as being a hard-nosed realist), Seligman makes a true distinction between a kind of insufferable (and often insincere) smiling giddiness and well-being, which leads to true flourishing. Moreover, he describes how to craft programs for leaders, teachers, and even the Army that can make the world a better place. Talk about a mission and a legacy! In particular, the work he’s doing on post-traumatic stress is remarkable and something I wish had been around when I was a young Marine.
Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being by Martin Seligman, Ph.D. (Free Press, 2011), reviewed by Steve Gladis, Ph.D.

Happiness Advantage: Post #2--Introduction to Happiness

Introduction: Turning the Switch from Depression to Happiness
a. A 2004 study at Harvard found 4 of 5 students suffered from depression during the school year. Only 45% of workers are happy at their jobs. And depression is 10 times today what it was in 1960. For years, most research was focused on diagnosing illnesses that create depression and unhappiness. In 1988 the ratio of negative to positive psychological studies was 17-1.
b. Medical School Syndrome—You get what you concentrate on. First-year med students study symptoms of many diseases, and many are convinced they’ve come down with those symptoms/diseases!
c. That same year (1998) Martin Seligman (U. of Penn.) became the head of the American Psychological Association and strategically shifted the organization toward investigating “positive psychology.” In 2006, Tal Ben-Shahar and Shawn Achor (the author), both professors at Harvard, developed a course on happiness, and nearly 1 in 6 students registered for it…the largest in the school’s history. These most privileged of students sought—needed—to find simple happiness.
d. Researchers did a “meta analysis” (a study of over 200 studies) on about 275,000 people and found that happiness affects every part of our lives for the better, including work, family, friendship, health, energy…you name it. People need to focus on the positive to protect themselves, especially those in certain professions. Consider auditors and lawyers—who are taught to look for flaws all day long. The toll is significant: Lawyers have three times more depression than other professions and law students suffer from dangerous levels of depression. Good news is that people can and do change at EVERY age. Neuroplasticity is the study of how flexible our brains are. For example, blind people’s fingers become more sensitive as does their sense of hearing. In effect, they see and feel with their re-routed brain.
e. The author found 7 positive patterns of success: The Happiness Advantage, The Fulcrum and the Lever, The Tetris Effect, Falling Up, The Zorro Circle, The 20-Second Rule, and Social Investment.

The Business of Happiness: An Introduction

The Business of Happiness (Regnery, 2010) by Ted Leonsis and John Buckley Reviewed by Steve Gladis, Ph.D.

Ted Leonsis is a happy guy, but not because he has a lot of money. Rather, he has a lot of money because he’s happy. If you read his autobiography, The Business of Happiness, you’ll get a chance to see how he found happiness through this journey from New York to Massachusetts, and eventually to DC and Virginia. His odyssey, from becoming an English major at Georgetown, to the high-tech business, to a start up, to AOL, to the Capitals, (now the Wizards) and possibly to outer space if he hits all the points on his “life list.” Scared by a near fatal plane crash, he compiled his list of 101 things he wanted to do before dying. This book takes the reader on an interesting journey through Leonsis’ professional life (including AOL and the AOL-Time Warner M&A mess) and then through what I would call his spiritual life—his journey to happiness. The biography itself was interesting, and the real payoff comes from the secrets he discovered along the way. His six secrets that led him (and presumably could move us) toward happiness and success: 1) Your Life List; 2) Multiple Communities of Interest; 3) Finding Outlets for Self-Expression; 4) Gratitude; 5) Giving Back; 6) A Higher Calling.

This week I’ll review each of these in more depth.