Daring Greatly: Post #4--Shame Resilience

Shame Resilience. To be fully engaged (wholehearted), you have to be vulnerable—resilient to shame.  To become shame resilient, we have to name our shame and reach out to others with it—get vulnerable—and then shame dissipates. Shame hates the light of day. Shame resistance comes with speaking about shame, reaching out to others, understanding shame triggers. Self-love and compassion help us greatly. Blame is a defensive shield we often put up to discharge our own discomfort. “If blame is driving [the car], shame is riding shotgun.” To become shame-resilient at work: 1. Need leaders who have honest conversations; 2. Root out shame in the organizations; 3. Make people feel normal by giving them examples of how others also had difficulty; 4. Teach people how to give honest, constructive, engaged feedback.